20 things

here's a random post. i'm listing...
10 things i can do (if i want to) & 10 things i can't do (even if i want to).

things that i can do:
1) stop using facebook & twitter for a month or so... tried this last year.

2) get really high grades (depends on what degree program i'm taking).

3) peel off evenly (like taking off jumpsuits) the skin of paralyzed frogs. i used to love doing this in high school. haha! but i realize that it's not ethical. so instead of paralyzing the frogs, i kill them.

4) not buy anything from watsons for 3 weeks. it would've been four... but i have to buy pads, pore nose tape, and wax strips. -___-

5) go to a party without makeup. did this once...! all my friends were like =O

reason why i made this blog

for months people have been asking me why do i blog,.. so i kinda got in the mood to blog about it. =))))

i made this blog to help me keep track of my improvements as a person. and how am i improving. does that sound lame?! if it does, forgive me for that. lololol. but that's really the only reason why i blog.

one day, when i'm old and grey, i wanna look back and read all the posts i've written. probly laugh at my young self for being so naive and ignorant about things that led me to writing stupid posts. i'd probly also get irritated by my typos and wrong grammar due to the fact that i don't edit. and i'd probly be ashamed of the posts i wrote while i'm still under the spell of severe mood swings. lololol!!! i'd probly laugh at my old pictures (those that i thought were all okay... but years after, i'd suddenly realize how much i looked like a retard).

my blog would also be a good reference to understanding my future grandchildren.

so... that's it...!
btw, wanna share this video... he's Papo. he's one of my classmates in highschool. he's really good...!

CLICK HERE FOR HIS YOUTUBE CHANNEL

unorganized thoughts on decision making

i had the mood to write because my dad's been forcing me to take some degree in college that i'm not particularly interested in. T_T it's just sad.

i'm the eldest of three sibs. i'm also the only girl.
i remember people being so proud of me when i was in preschool. then i also remember people telling me what my future should be. (okay, it sounds like i'm talking about fortune tellers. but no. haha!)

Add caption

truth is, i regret that i was so into learning when i was a child. it only caused their high expectations (because i'm the eldest) to get even higher (like i'm supergirl ready to save the world...blahblah)... even back when i was a child i knew that at some point i would be a disappointment to these people. i hated the thought of it. i hate disappointing people that at some point i get disappointed with myself too. wth?! lololol.

as a child, elders in our family (including parents) repeatedly told us what we should do when we grow up. who we should be, and how we should be that. seriously. i liked it at that time-- when i was still a child and still don't know what to do with my life... the only thing i practice decision making at that time was if im gonna call my friends to go over and play barbie or if i'm just gonna play hotwheels with my brothers. =)))) true.

hair talk

i did cut my hair short. seriously. i just wanna try to do layers on my hair... and it did turn out quite beautifully. really. i've watched a tutorial on youtube on how to layer your hair using a razor... it's super easy... for weeks i was really glad with the result... but just a while ago, i've dyed my hair back to black and i realized it would've been better if my hair was longer.:/ gaaahh...

my hair is actually brown when i took this picture...
i don't know why it looks black. :|

recycling pictures... lololol... coz i can't seem to find my phone's usb connector again. :| so i still can't upload pictures from my twin cousins' christening... :|

 so yeah.. i kinda regret cutting my hair now... i just hope it'll grow faster. :)

what exercise can do

i've been physically inactive for the past years.... you have no idea how much i hated exercise because i don't like sweating. but 2 days ago i took these pictures using the front camera of my phone... i was shocked at how 2 months of table tennis can actually reshape my fat arms. lololol... haha! see the picture below.

我正在学习日语！

我学习不只是因为我需要。我想学习。我想学习语言。它给了我成就感。一年，我应当学习日语！哈哈！^___^   然后我可以去日本学习与我的朋友。


因为觉得尴尬。
我尚未能说流利的普通话和韩语，但我学习日语。T_T
无奈。

late mothers' day post

... more like late mothers' day photo dump.
okay... forgive me for not being able to write anything cheesy... i just feel that this post is way too late for that... and i'm dead tired since yesterday. got to play table tennis for 4 hours straight (technically 3 hours... coz i had long breaks in between. lololol). had so much fun that i over-worked myself. -___-

sisterhood

many might be wondering where's my mothers' day post? or will i ever make any...? actually, i'm planning to write about how mothers' day went for our family as soon as i get a hold of my phone's usb connector. i can't seem to find it and my phone charger. some relative might've borrowed both without my permission and forgot to return it. -____-
well, that's just a shallow assumption... coz that's how it always goes.

in the meantime, imma blog about what happened earlier... i went to bond with my highschool sisters! lololol.... =))) we stayed at Cielo's house... watched some movies... camwhored... made videos... ate a lot... etc.. gaaahhh... it was so fun... we're like retards. we could just sit and stare at each other then laugh! hahahaha!!! i missed them so much... but what i liked most about today is that i have set my goal.

long post

*as always... i didn't state the name of the person because i respect her right to privacy*

i don't even know where to start. i'm angry and frustrated coz i just got put down and somewhat insulted by someone who's "close" to me. and now i'm doubting that fact. well, one reason would be... she was far,far,far away when i was growing up.... and is still far away til now.

we did a lot of talking... actually she did. we did go through lots of topics... but there were 4 that really got me in a rage. got really angry because i was accused of being not affectionate(to the extent of being ungrateful), a shallow person, a hypocrite, and a liar.

[this is normal... you know... being angry and stuff... nobody can dictate what other people should feel. unless, ofcourse, you're God... then by all means, do so.]

i got angry because she's supposed to know me. well atleast she thinks she does know me a lot better than i know myself. first, the topic was about me being unaffectionate. you see there are two forms of affection... well, atleast for me... :| i tend to show my affectionate side only to people who are really in need of comfort from a friend but doesn't seem to know that i care for them. on the other hand... i'm still affectionate to those people who already know i care for them... the feeling is mutual. they care for me-i care for them. it's a fact. it's

automatic response. mutual. no need to say/ show it over and over again just to let them know. (unless they're really slow/numb). but i'll be there for all the people i care about when they need me.

more on the Zalora thingy

so i just got my pictures from Elle's cam... these are all from the launching of Zalora Philippines :">

the invite they sent thru email. :) tweeted this a few days back...

a photo of me taken by Elle. gaaahh... i look asdfghjkl tired. T_T

blogging and reading-- two different stories

so here i am today blogging in the wee hours of the night. -___-

i wanna talk about blogging... just because i noticed the difference in the age of bloggers here in the Philippines and bloggers in Taiwan and Malaysia. gaad... if only you knew... there are lots of teen bloggers there...! i mean... thinking of it makes me wonder that maybe those teens were the only source of traffic in their countries. or better yet, the only ones keeping the internet alive. lololol. =))))

so what about the Philippines? most people who are serious on blogging or serious on keeping an online journal are in their twenties and above. T_T i realized this when i attended some bloggers' event last night. gaaahh... i was lucky enough to have found 3 ladies who became instant friends because we're kinda like the same age. ^_^

all we did was munch on food. haha!!! coz everyone was so formal and they all looked professional... and who would want to talk to kids? lololol. with my height and their high heels, i bet they wouldn't even dare approach me coz both our necks would hurt while talking. T_T lololol. *shallow* anyway... for you to get a clearer picture, i got this:

GeoMedical Lens XCK105

writing a review for the sake of writing a review. T_T gaaahh... okay... so here it goes...
some time ago, a friend bought us daily lenses. you know, the one you throw away after one use... we used it for some school activity... regretted never wanting to take pictures T_T coz it's color brown. light brown. diameter is 14.8mm. a lot of people actually liked it on me... but i didn't coz it's all too weird. light brown color on asian eyes?! na-uh. and it's kinda big. my eyes looked so doll-like. not my thing.

that was some time ago... but up to now, people are still asking me about contact lenses and stuff like i'm some expert. but i'm not.

so, why write a review all of a sudden?
a friend invited me to cosplay and look like a doll... and for some reason, lenses is the "must" part of the makeup. :)

with contacts on

so i have new black lenses from GeoMedical...

barely inspired

okay.. this is all because i think i'm craving to shop for jeans and accessories. but it's not at all practical. because first of all, i'm broke. secondly, it's summer vacation... so that basically makes me more broke. the 1k i got last week from teaching english to a korean isn't enough especially since i don't want to ask for money from my parents or my grandmother... coz i think it's not reasonable. so where did i spend my money? first of all, 100Php goes to my tithes. second, 200Php went to my brother for accompanying me. geeezz... soo much for "talent fee". lololol... then i bought a new pair of jeans with what was left + some money i saved. T_T gaaahhh... i'm broke.

the art of planning

to start, i don't like planning... and it scares the **** out of me. coz i got this mindset when i was younger that when i plan on doing things, i end up stressed about thinking how to do all those and it practically leaves me to doing nothing. T_T

ME mastering the art of planning... *BOWS*

but then, my college seatmate thought me how. lololol. she's always stressed... she plans even the smallest detail of her day. gaaahhh O.o one day, our class took a stress-meter test and she got the highest score... i think she got 97? and mine was like 34... =))))) hahaha!!! our guidance counselor said that those who got 95+ are candidates to having sudden heart attacks when they get older. =O so yeah... we always try to calm her down =))) she taught me the art of planning and stressing on things... and i taught her the art of meditating and relaxing. lololol. it's good to have a "give & take" relationship ya'know.

now i have planned out so many things for my blog that i thought would be better if i write about it now. don't wanna forget all those!!!

so here are my plans...

jio hates cameras

i had soo many attempts to capture just one decent photo of jio recently... but he doesn't cooperate. T_T i think i got him traumatized with my phone's camera flash a week ago... :|

me trying to direct jio to face the cam